Dept. of Ephemeral Communications

Mz. TSUNAMI: “Come on, I bet you’d be really good at it!”

PMG-0962: “That’s the point. I’d be too good at it. Everyone would think I was rigging the odds in my favor.”

Mz. TSUNAMI: “Nonsense. If anything you’d make things more fair. Come on, everyone likes hanging out with you!”

PMG-0962: “Yes, because people find a lot more dropped coins and the vending machine dispenses more free drinks when I’m around. Nobody ever just wants to hang out.”

Mz. TSUNAMI: “What do you call what we’re doing right now?”

PMG-0962: “You’re trying to convince me to do something I don’t want to do, but that you want me to do.”

Mz. TSUNAMI: “Because I think you’d have fun! You look so lonely back in your room.”

PMG-0962: “My cell.”

Mz. TSUNAMI: “Technically a cell, yes, but you can leave whenever you want! Think of it as getting your own private room. I still have to share a bathroom with a ███████.”

PMG-0962: “A private room with clear plastic walls and food delivered by pneumatic tube thrice a day.”

Mz. TSUNAMI: “And you don’t have to wait in line at the cafeteria! You’re luck-“

PMG-0962: �1

Mz. TSUNAMI: “-Fortunate. It’s all in how you look at things. And if you don’t like spending time there, you should come to the conference room with us and play!”

PMG-0962: “I don’t know, I can’t help but feel I’m being used.”

Dr. FOWL: “Hey, Penelope, are you busy?”

PMG-0962: “A little busy to help you roll for that anime JPEG you want, Bio.”

Dr. FOWL: “First of all, █████████ is from a French game, second of all, she’s a PNG, a JPEG would introduce noticable artifacting into the largely flat colors of the picture, third of all, you’re thinking of Astro, I’m more into World Flipper, and fourth of all, I just wanted to thank you for your input on my tie. It went over really well at the █████████ meeting.”

PMG-0962: “Oh, thank you! Anyone would have said the same, really. I just picked the one that matched your eyes.”

Dr. FOWL: “Still, I appreciate it. Most people don’t look past the, you know, fur and big, sharp teeth. I’ll talk to Astro about bothering someone else with his phone games. I don’t even think he knows your name- he keeps calling you ‘the luck elemental’.”

PMG-0962: “Thanks. I’m running out of polite ways to turn him down.”

Dr. FOWL: “He’s a good guy at heart, he just needs someone to yank his head out of the clouds sometimes. You coming to tabletop tonight? We’re doing Session 0 for Lasers and Lingonberries and could use a fifth.”

PMG-0962: “You know what? I think me and Tsunami were just about to head down there.”

Mz. TSUNAMI: �2


  1. Please ensure your system has a font capable of displaying U+E4B2, SOUND OF A WITHERING GLARE 

  2. Please ensure your system has a font capable of displaying U+F011, SOUND OF VICTORIOUS FIST PUMPING